Well, I only gone and did it, didn’t I! How did it go? What happened? Did I, in my nervousness, forget to get dressed and walk half the distance in the nudie before realising and running back to get changed and start all over again?
Terrified you crawl further into the corner, moving away from the light as you seek the dark. The thing in the room sniffs, searching for you, its sharp claws clicking on the wooden floor. Desperately you reach out for a weapon to defend yourself with, laying hands on the nearest object within reach. Grasping, panicking, you pull towards you…. a blurb:
“The forest is a deadly place. Nobody knows this better than Penny. She has spent her whole life hiding in the darkness, shielding herself from the terrors that watch and wait within the trees. When Penny is abandoned and left for dead in the forest, she is forced to navigate this terrifying labyrinth in order to return home to her son and take revenge on the woman who tried to kill her. But the murderous creatures with the false smiles aren’t the only monsters to lurk in the forest, and some demons may be closer than she thinks.”
Look down there! Go on, look at that badge thing below this sentence:
That, my blog reading chums and chumettes, is my official Bloggers Bash badge that confirms my status as an award winning blogger. Yes, that’s right book blog fans: You are reading with your very eyes an…AWARD WINNING BLOG!
This isn’t just any old run of the mill blog now, don’t you know. Oh no! This is a Marks and Spencers blog. It now has bells AND whistles.
But Mr. Beardy Book Blogger, I hear you cry – nay, clamour – will this change you? Will you still be the daft, silly idiot that we love to follow and read? Will you continue to speak to the common person?
Hello followers, casual readers and unfortunate passers-by who cannot locate the ‘back’ button fast enough or have particularly slow computers that haven’t responded to the pressing of said button. You may as well stay and read this now you’re here. What’s the worst that could happen?
So, hello to you all and welcome to another instalment of “In Conversation With…”. Last time we spoke to The Beardy Book Blogger himself. He was an idiot, but a pleasant enough idiot, I guess. You can read that here, if you’re feeling particularly masochistic.
Of course the more observant readers amongst you will know that *drum roll please* I am The Beardy Book Blogger! I know right? So why did I interview myself? Well, I explained all that in the previous post so hop off, have a gander, and then return to this point here.
Hello again. All caught up? Amaze beans.
So why am I doing this again? Well…
The other evening I went to a Thing. What Thing was this? It was a book launch, but not any old book launch, oh no! This was a dual launch for Steph Broadribb’s Deep Blue Trouble and Johana Gustawsson’s Keeper, both published by Orenda Books.
How did it go? What happened? Who did I stalk, er, talk to? Why didn’t they call the police? Well, I sent myself, The Beardy Book Blogger, off to find out and this is what I/he/we experienced…
Now, before you all turn away in disgust, I know that this isn’t a bookish post, but this is MY blog, so, ner and so forth. All the same, I realise I’m taking a chance with this one; after all, you follow me for reviews and other bookish shenanigans, but if you read on I’m sure, or at least I hope, you’ll understand why.
In Part 1 we discovered that it was during the Stone Age that books were invented, but they were inscribed directly onto the walls of the cave and so were not portable. Although the use of animal skins became popular the Ice Age put paid to them as people needed the skins to keep warm and survive. Thus it was, and thus it were, and thus it did, that books vanished for an age. Eventually Bronze Age person rediscovered them and, using the newly invented and infinitely shinier bronze, books were rediscovered and enjoyed by many. But then the Iron Age came along and messed it all up as books moved on to the much less shinier, duller and way more heavier iron. These books were so heavy and wordy that they had to be pulled along by horses which, being new themselves, only the rich could afford. And thus, again, books fell out of common use and into the hands of the rich. Bloody iron age, spoiling stuff for the low people. The more enterprising of them took to scratching stories into the mud, but they were invariably trampled over or dug up and smeared over straw bales to make houses with.
And so Britain was stuck in a bookish rut. The Iron Age dragged on, and books were dragged about, for what seemed like 1000’s of years. That was until the Romans turned up. But we’re getting ahead of ourselves a bit here.
Let’s backtrack a tad and see what the Egyptians were doing book-wise, shall we? No? well, tough.